Harry Twatter and the StoneHard Penis
by J.K. Rowlingonthefloor
Summary: Harry and the gang get into a sticky situation.


Harry Twatter and the Stone-Hard Penis of His Current Gay SLAVE BOY

Hermione awoke to screams. She had fallen asleep in the Gryfindor Common room with her various erotic spell books splayed about all around her. "I wish I had a man" she thought to her silently. But back to the screaming. Hermione arose cautiously from her comfortable leather chair that caressed her virginal vagina just so. The screams were obviously emanating from the boys dormitory. She immediately rushed to the source of the screaming. But alas she was stopped at the door to the boys dormitory by that retarded mongoloid kid whose in all the books. You know the one. I think his name is Neville or something. He said "You can't come in here, you don't have a penis!" Hermione jumped on his face and suffocated Neville with her cunt muscles. She rushed into the sleeping chamber and saw a truly disturbing scene. Harry was lying spread-eagle on his bed with Ron slamming a brand new NIMBUS 3000 up Harry's bleeding anus.

"Blimey Hermione!" Exclaimed Ron as he flushed a deep red. Actually, it was the same color as Harry's bleeding rectum. "Didn't see you there!"

Harry was still moaning in ecstasy, it seemed he was so focused on his bleeding anus that he didn't see Hermione's flabbergasted face.

Hermione finally regained her composure. "Godric's gonads Ron! It looks like Harry will need a powerful healing spell after that ordeal!"

"Bugger Hermione!" said Ron, "I don't think that old shit for balls Dumbledore will take kindly to Harry's bleeding anus."

Harry finally spoke up "Hermione, do you want to get in on this?"

Hermione winked at him. "Oh Harry, you know that I only take _my_ broomsticks up my throbbing love tunnel."

Ron was staring at Hermione with a dazed look on his face. Suddenly, a hippogriff crashed through the window. You may not have known it, but hippogriffs have a sixth sense for broomstick rape, and this particular one, Buckbeak, had a huge rager already.

Buckbeak was only used to mating with it's own species, so it perched on the window and started jacking it as Harry started brooming Ron's poopshoot. One orgasm, two orgasms, three orgasms; Buckbeak was moaning in delight. A hippogriff has a very loud call, so naturally everyone heard. In rushed in Professor MacGonagall. She stared for a second, and without saying anything, shedded off her robe AND underwear, showing off her glowing, wrinkly body. She jumped on top of Neville's lifeless body, and she took control and pumped him on top until his dead ass came. All of the sudden, Draco Malfoy enters the room.

"Aw horsefeathers Draco," Harry exclaimed, "even though that we are enemies, could you do me the honor of putting your old splintered broomstick inside of my stretched out asshole?"

"I LOST IT!" said Draco, and he ran out of the room.

After this happened, Ron just said, "I heard that he can't get it up!" Everyone chuckled, then got back to their business. In walked in Hagrid, who swiftly penetrated Buckbeak, and started pumping his short (2.5") but hard unit inside of the hippogriffs tight poohole. He jizzed with pleasure, as the hippogriff continued to squawk. It's high pitched squawk caused the foundation of the shitty Gryffindor Common room to collapse. Nobody noticed that this "show" fell in the Quidditch stadium, RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE OF The MATCH BETWEEN HUFFLEPUFF AND RAVENCLAW! Practically everyone in the school were watching Harry brooming Ron, Professor MacGonagall fucking the shit out of the lifeless Neville, Hagrid giving it to Buckbeak, and Hermonie pleasuring herself rapidly. Soon everyone in the stands started to jerk it.

Everyone that is, except for Cornelius Fudgepacker. This director of the Ministrey of Magic was asexual (like matteo) so he got no pleasure from watching a boy being penetrated by a broom. Luckily Cornelius Fudgepacker had ass-cancer that he got from being a faggot and watching the production or RENT more than 0 times.

Suddenly JK Rowling landed in her private jet and announced in her annoying cockney accent (as she gripped bags of money) "As you can see I decided to take Harry Potter series in a more adult direction, I think once Harry reached his 5th year he would trust his friends enough to allow them to jam large objects up his ass. HIS PARENTS DID DIE YOU FUCKING ASSHOLES VOLDEMORT ICED THOSE NIGGAS. HE WAS LIKE "YOU LOOK MAD NIGGERISH HARRY POTTERS PARENTS, NOW U GUNA BE GATTED BY MY WAND" THEN HARRY'S MOM WAS LIKE "FUCK THAT I'M GUNA DIE PROTECTING MY SON AND MY LOVE IS GUNA PROTECT THAT NIGGA" AND VOLDEMORT WAS LIKE "HAHAHAH THAT SHIT IS MAD CORNY AND GAY, U ALL GUNA GET ICED. And that's basically what happened.

Needless to say everyone was shocked. Suddenly, and without warning, that one Irish kid, his name's Seamus O'Drinkyfights or some shit, started to clap and the entire magical world joined in including the horny hippogriff. Needless to say it was super emotional and shit, blah blah blah a lot of pirates showed up and raped all the women.

The End?


End file.
